This is all I have to give

Well, it’s the 2nd week of the book study Am I Messing Up My Kids.  I have to say that I have been kind of a slacker this week because I only just finished reading the chapters this morning.  When I have an “assignment” to read something then I usually get it done in one sitting, but I just didn’t want to rush through it this week.

The verse for the week is Psalm 71:8 “My mouth is filled with your praise, declaring your splendor all day long.”

Hmm, at first I wasn’t sure what to think about that one.  I was good with this verse until I came to the “all day long” part.  I struggle with keeping it all together throughout the entire day.  Mornings in our house, during the summer months, are lazy and calm.  Then by mid-afternoon, when my three year old refuses to nap and my nine year old has rolled her eyes at me one too many times I have just about had it.

Later on in this section another verse appeared that was such an encouragement to me.  Isaiah 2:3 says, “He will teach us his ways, so that we may walk in his paths.”  That took a huge load off of my shoulders.  You mean I don’t have to do it all on my own?  I easily forget that I’m not in this alone.  God is there to support me and lift me up when I need it most.  I just need to remember to go to him before I have reached my breaking point.

Lysa also discussed using some powerful words to get me throughout my day.  When I feel like the stress of it all is starting to get to me I just simply say, “Jesus fill me.”  She listed an array of examples and ended each sentence with, “Jesus fill me.”  How simple is that?  It is so simple that I think even I can remember it.

She also brought up the fact that we all have a God-shaped hole in our hearts.  Many of us, including me, try to fill it with the wrong things.  Things that provide us a temporary satisfaction.  When we really should be turning to Him and saying, “Jesus fill me.”

I really liked this analogy too and I think it would be easy to teach to my children as well:

  • Use our souls to love God.
  • Use our bodies to serve God.
  • Use our mouths to praise God.

Another quote that hit home for me this week was “Your husband and children do not have to be your Savior.”  That is so true!  We spend so much time and energy in trying to be great moms.  We seek the approval and validation from our spouse or children to feel like we are appreciated and loved.  Then when we don’t get it we are devastated.  I know that I need to stop looking for the approval of my family and remember that I already have a Savior.

One of the chapters talked about treating yourself and creating a care package of things that you enjoy.  I feel guilty when I try to do something nice just for me.  The thoughts of doubt start to creep in and make me feel like I don’t deserve it or I should be doing something to help my family.  Lysa really helped to explain that it’s alright to have moments and things that are just for you.

If I were to create myself a care package here is what I would put in it:

  • Iced green tea from Panera
  • Reese’s peanut butter cups
  • Vibrant colored sharpies
  • A fresh notebook to write in
  • New running shoes

What would you put in your care package?  Make a list of things that you enjoy and write them down.  Just thinking about the things that I enjoy, just for me, makes me instantly feel better.

I will leave you with this verse that really spoke to me and lifted me up: I John 3:1-2 “How great is the love He has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God!  And that is what we are!  The reason the world does not know us is that it did not know him.  Dear friends, now we are children of God, and what we will be has not yet been made known,  But we know that when he appears, we shall be like him, for we shall see him as he is.”

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Being a Mom is Tough!

As I go along on this journey of being a mom I find myself looking for help, support and peace at every corner.  So when I came across a book study titled, Am I Messing Up My Kids?, I couldn’t help but be curious.  Then when I saw who the author of the book I said, “Sign me up!”

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I downloaded the book right away on my kindle and read the first chapter right then.  I couldn’t wait for the study to begin and be able to join other moms, just like me, who are just looking for some answers to the same questions that we all ask ourselves.

  • Did I handle that situation the right way?
  • Am I portraying the traits that I want my kids to see each day?
  • Why can’t I have a little peace in my day? (at least when I’m in the bathroom)

The list could go on and on.  Week 1 for the book study was titled Being a Mom is Tough.  That is an understatement for sure.  I watched the intro video and immediately felt a sense of calmness.  Our assignment this week was to read the first 5 chapters of the book.  This only took me two separate afternoon nap times.  I wrote down some notes and verses that were uplifting and thought I would share them here.

The verse of the week is Psalm 23:3 he restores my soul.  Take a deep breath and really let that sink in.  The word restores is so powerful, isn’t it?  I mean there are days when my head hits the pillow and I think to myself, “How am I going to wake up and do this all over again tomorrow?”  To know that he restores me is such a comfort.

The ladies in the intro video gave some examples of imperfect mom moments and encouraged us to think of our own.

I have two children, Kara is 9 and Kallen is 3.  They are the type of children who act like perfect angels around others, especially strangers, but when  we are in the confines of our home they can be not so perfect.  I always say that I would rather it be the way it is then to have children who act out all the time or in public settings.  Well, I have had a moment or two or three where I have reached my boiling point and just lost it.  The kind of lost it where you can feel your blood pressure rising and you have a splint second thought that you should probably take a moment to calm down, but you don’t.

One day in the middle of one of these moments my daughter was arguing with me about something.  To tell you the truth I can’t even remember what it was about.  She had already rolled her eyes and stormed out of the room.  I should have let it go.  I should have given her time to herself, but I didn’t.  Instead I went after her and kept on about proving her wrong and she had reached her boiling point by then.  So here we are both screaming back and forth at each other.  Neither of us listening to the other.  As I left her room I yelled back, “Well, you can just stay in here then!” and slammed the door behind me.  Not my proudest mommy moment and reflecting back I feel ashamed of myself. #imperfectmoms

In reading the chapters this week I feel that there are some important points that Lysa makes:

“Let my time with the Lord overflow while withholding my to-do list.”  Uh-huh

“How can I continue to pour out if I’m not being filled back up?” Yep

The best quote for me, by far, is “You are exactly the mom God knew your children needed.”  Thank goodness.

I am looking forward to really being filled up over the course of this study and another that I am also doing at the same time.  It has been a long time coming and I am excited of the things to come!

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